“Experience is a wonderful teacher. Too bad the tuition usually includes public shame and ruined underwear.”
GhostSlacker was being dragged face-first across a muddy field by a giant kite shaped like his own head.
“My face has finally found a way to make me exercise.”
He’d been hired to promote the town’s annual kite festival.
The organizer wanted one giant kite that advertised everything.
Free food.
Cheap tickets.
Family fun.
Big prizes.
Seven different promises hung from seven giant banners.
GhostSlacker had designed the whole thing.
And now it was trying to kill him.
The wind howled.
Mud filled his pockets.
His left shoe vanished into a ditch.
Then a little girl walked past, flying a plain red kite.
Her kite sailed beautifully.
GhostSlacker’s giant mess crashed into a portable toilet.
The door exploded.
An angry man stumbled out wearing blue toilet paper.
GhostSlacker stared at the wreckage.
“Well, there’s a lesson nobody wants printed on a T-shirt.”
His Hook Miners newsletter had the same problem.
Seven promises crammed into one opening.
He opened The Lesson Ledger and fed it the day’s painful experience.
The tool pulled out the biggest lesson.
Then turned it into:
“I Tried Packing 7 Big Promises Into One Opening Hook. The Best Thing I Did Was Delete 6 of Them. Here’s What That Mess Taught Me.”
GhostSlacker smiled.
“One hook. One clear promise. Seven promises just give readers seven reasons to get confused.”
The little girl nodded.
Then pointed behind him.
“Hey, mister. Your giant head is flying away.”
GhostSlacker turned.
His enormous kite had caught another gust.
It was now sailing over the parking lot.
With his laptop tangled in the strings.
And his pants.
He watched both disappear over the trees.
“Wonderful. Today’s lesson cost me a computer and my dignity.”
The girl looked down.
“Your dignity’s still here.”
She pointed at the portable toilet.
GhostSlacker sighed.
“Leave it. That’s where it belongs.”
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